Thursday, January 8, 2009

The saga of T and Woody the woodpecker.

I was minding my own business when the phone on my desk rings. I answer it and this is what I hear:

"Hi Mommy!" Honestly for a minute, I thought it was the wrong number. I never get phone calls from the kids, and so for a minute, I forgot that yes, now occasionally I do go by "mommy".

Me: Hi, Adam
A: Guess what Daddy did?
Me: Hmmm, no telling. What?
A: He shot Woody!!
Me: Oh, so he finally go him, huh?
A: Yep.
Me: Is he dead?
A: deader than a doornail (I heard T tell him to say this)
Me: Are you sad?
A: No.
Me: (kind of disappointed) Your arent? Not even a little bit?
A: No. He was ruining my house!
Me: (laughing my butt off)

This is a historical day for us. See, it wasnt just some annoying woodpecker that he just decided to kill. This is the SAME woodpecker we have been battling with for 2 years. It was kind of a love/hate relationship with T and Woody. More on the hate part, but I am sad because, I love all creatures and because it was kind of fun, this little thing they had between them.

T works nights, so has to try and sleep during the daytime. This woodpecker has been stopping by almost daily and "tap tap tap tap tap". Right above our bedroom window. So, T has suffered lack of sleep to this. For years now T has been going out to the deck to try to shoot Woody with a bb gun. I swear the woodpecker would listen for T to get out of bed and then wait for him to step out on the deck. As soon as T stepped out the woodpecker would fly away. And he wouldnt fly out of sight either, but just out of range of the gun to a tree and watch T as he swore under his breath and surveyed the increasing damage to our house.

T was quiet about getting out the door too. Eventually it would take him a minute to open the door, to ensure it was quiet when it opened, and he was quietly and slowly getting out of bed. He locked all animals up when the tapping started, so a dog wouldnt burst out the dog door and scare Woody off before T got a chance to get out there. Still, the wood pecker lived. Eventually Woody would sit there while T raised the bb gun and then he would fly again. Poor T was being taunted by this bird.

Last week T went out and bought a pellet gun, and a very effective one at that. He spent a hour or so setting it up and sighting it in, and shooting telephone books with it. We oohed and aahed at what this pellet gun could do to the yellow pages.

This morning, he was ready and Woody got complacent. He let T (who wasnt asleep, but doing things around the house and watching A), get his gun, step outside, get him in his sites and then paused one second too long.

Now before you go getting TOO upset (no one loves animals more than I, NO ONE),according to many sources, death is the only thing that will stop a woodpecker once they have a target in mind. Besides, the wacky, deviant red headed bird of cartoons wasnt depicted that way by accident. The creator of the woody woodpecker cartoons was inspired by his battle with one certain woodpecker that was driving HIM nuts. We would have tried other methods if they worked.

Poor Woody, Im really going to miss him. Our house however may survive now, which is a good thing. Oh and T's giddiness at finally defeating his nemisis is kind of fun too.

This is kind of what our woodpecker looked like. I think. I know it wasnt the redheaded variety though.


Stacey said...

RIP, woody! :)

Erin said...

Hahahaha! I love that A was the one who got to share the news. Poor Woody...not really. :)

Kim said...

Hee, Hee!.. I have had some of those in my yard, but fortunately they have just been peckin' up in the trees....they are really loud too!

Heidi said...

Poor Woody. I would have shot his hind end too!