Sunday, November 30, 2008

Turkey day blues.

So, I have always heard that with adopting older kids come the possibility that holidays may be somewhat sullen. It is true, indeed. At least it was at our house on Thanksgiving. This time of year, of course brings up thoughts and feelings, and memories of family, even for little people.

Sasha was awfully clingy, more so than usual, which is alot. She kept slipping away to her room though in between boughts of clinging and I would find her in there looking pretty sad. She claimed that she was just bored...which I know wasnt true, we were at home and she is NEVER bored. She was sad...and so was N. N looked sad and wasnt the normal chatty boy he is, although he did hide his better because he just lost himself in the football game. Adam, seemed normal enough, probably because he is still so young.

Even though the memories may not be from their birth family, because they were pretty young when removed, they have had two "adoptive" homes, prior to us, which Im sure they are remembering, especially around this time.

I just hope that someday, they will realize that they are home and that this is their family and though the sadness may never completely go away, I hope that they will find comfort in their permanancy.

It will be interesting to see if Christmas will be the same way, or worse. I need though to make a point of pulling N or S aside and TALKING with them about it, or just listening if they want to talk about the feelings. Chances are that they will just keep it in...but they need to know I will listen, if they want to talk. I didnt do that really, on T day, and I wish that I would have.


Mel said...

I can speak from experience each and every holiday gets better!!!

Erin said...

Amen to what Mel said - V has been with us for 2 years and it was the best holiday yet! :)